Mario Kart: Endless Revolution
by masdalgred
Summary: A story based on the new mario kart game, featuring characters filled with ingeniosity and wit! A boy discovers a game with a soul... R, R and R!
1. Chapter 1

Mario Kart: Endless Revolution

**Mario Kart: Endless Revolution**

Chapter 1: Mario's Story

_G'day! I'm Jake Huxhall, but known far and wide as "Mario". Most recently, Nintendo released a game system known as the "Nintendo Revolution" (like a Wiimote with a disc slot and a projector), complete with the game "Mario Kart: Endless Revolution". Needless to say, I'm completely awesome at it, but recently strange things have been happening every time I boot it up. Like last week, for example…_

It started off like any other day. I overslept, missed the bus and had to walk to school. I live six miles away from where I learn, so by the time I got there it was almost lunch. Long story short, I now have detention for all eternity, give or take. Luckily for me, my mate Marcus accidentally blew up the chemistry block _for the third time, _so I was not alone.

When the time came to finally go home, I decided to pop 'round to Marcus's for a quick round of Mario Kart. I pulled out my Revolution, he pulled out his, and the game began!

THREE…

I revved the throttle menacingly.

TWO…

Marcus pushed his hat up out of his eyes.

ONE…

I zeroed in, diverting all my concentration to the race.

GO!

Our racers shot off, zooming down the track. Mario quickly overtook Luigi, but the green plumber stole the advantage going round a sharp corner. I pelted over a speed boost and thought I had this thing won, when suddenly a sharp force hit Mario in the back and caused my controller to vibrate. _A red shell, _I thought to myself. But I couldn't let that distract me. We were coming round the final bend, and I suddenly felt so determined to win. No, more than that. I _had _to win. I pressed down on the throttle, and suddenly the most bizarre thing happened. I was seeing the race through the eyes of Mario. It was like I _was _Mario. I pressed down with my thumb, but the steering wheel in my hands wasn't a wiil (wii remote plus wheel. Pretty clever, eh?), but an _actual_ steering wheel. Bearing that in mind, I pressed down hard with my foot…

And shot backwards. Hell, I'm thirteen. I don't know how to drive! Luigi shot past the finish line and Marcus let out a whoop of delight. It's not often that I let him win.

Later when I tried to describe what had happened to Marcus, he laughed and said something about "not being able to handle defeat". I got angry at this and threw my Revolution at him, but it bounced off his head and he just laughed s'more.

Later on my way home, I bumped into a couple of guys in hoodies. I walked past them, trying not to catch their attention, and carried on my way. They evidently didn't feel the same way, though, because a few seconds later a small rock hit the back of my head. I, not wanting any trouble, took out my wallet and phone, ready to hand them over. Thievery obviously wasn't their motive, because they just started throwing more rocks. I dived into an alleyway, hoping to lose them, but just found more angry rock-throwing hoodies. I lashed out with my fist, hoping to catch one of them, but instead hit a fire-escape ladder. _Stupid ladder, _I thought to myself, _there's no way such a useless thing could ever help anyone… no, wait, hang on… _I grabbed on of the rungs of the rusty old ladder and pulled, hard. It snapped off in my hands. _Perfect, _I and swung the iron bar menacingly. "Okay! Who wants some?" I declared, waving the bar around my head. I must have gotten a little over-enthusiastic at that point, because I accidentally clipped a hoodies over the ear and knocked him out cold. They took this as a sign of hostility, and the rock-pelting began anew. A particularly big one hit me in the head, and I collapsed to the ground, completely depleted of energy. I just lay there, waiting for the final blow, but it never came. Instead a hand reached out to help me up.

"Sorry about that," The voice at the other end of the helping hand said, "the boys sometimes get a bit excited when they meet strangers."

"Maybe you should get a professional trainer." I wittily replied.

"Well, I've tried, but they just don't seem to take to new people." His expression was deadly serious. "Anyway, the reason I brought you here is a simple proposition…"

"No."

"I haven't even told you what it is yet!"

"Yeah, but your hoodie army threw rocks at my head!"

"You know, I've always thought of them as more of a battalion… hey, shut up! Anyway, I just want a race. It's that simple. A three-circuit race on Mario Kart Revolution."

"Uh-huh. And what's the catch?"

"Well, if you win, you might just be good enough to join our gang. Whereas if you lose, you are of no use to us. Well, maybe not _no _use…" he threw a rock up in the air and caught it. "We could use you for target practice."

So basically, I'm in the deep stuff. I win, I work for a gang that enjoys throwing rocks at people and making them join their rock-throwing gang. But if I lose…

Crap.


	2. Chapter 2

Mario Kart: Endless Revolution

**Mario Kart: Endless Revolution**

Chapter 2: Luigi's Story

_Hi everybody! Marcus Hirst's the name, speed's my game! And so is punching hedgehogs with stupid catchphrases. Most recently I bought a game called Mario Kart: Endless Revolution, thinking it would be fun. Quite the contrary. This game almost got me and a lot of my friends killed on numerous occasions, the earliest of which I can remember at the hands of some grumpy hoodies. It all happened but a chapter ago…_

Ha ha! Having finally defeaten the karting _god _that is Jake Huxell, my euphoria was unstoppable! Then I realized the fool had forgotten his hat, and the unstoppability ceased. _Idiot, _I thought. He had only left a few minutes ago, so I decided to go after him to return it, and maybe gloat a bit more. What I discovered down the street, however, was not a hatless loser, but a small regiment of hoodies throwing rocks at a hatless loser. I considered interfering, but before I could, a taller hoodie in camouflage colours stopped it with a wave of his hand. He started saying stuff, most of which I couldn't hear, but I caught the words, "training", "target practice" and "pineapple". Something sinister was going on…

Suddenly, guns were drawn. One of the hoodies had a sketchbook, and he was clearly bored with the rate at which things were going. I spied a little stick-man soldier drawn in the margin, and spied an opportunity to save Jake.

"UWAAAA!!" I cried, and beat Doodling Hoodie over the head. He turned around to defend against my attack, but already I was gone, kicking another distracted chav on the shins. The strategy worked well, striking hoodie after hoodie, until it came to number four. He had already noticed my extreme battle plan, and when I dropped from the shadows to deliver a swift kick to head, he grabbed my leg and threw me into the middle of a road. I rolled quickly to avoid an oncoming lorry, and threw a ball of clay at the hoodie, knocking him unconscious. By this time the remaining hoodies had noticed me, and they all swarmed to attack. This provided Jake a chance to run away, and run he did, straight for the hills. Which left only me, in quite a predicament.

There were five angry guys rushing at me. I jumped over one, kicked another in the face, and landed running. A well-aimed rock narrowly missed my left shoulder, and I sped up a bit. I darted into an alleyway, followed by the three remaining members of the Hoodie Squad. Hiding behind a bin, I threw a can at the fire escape ladder. It fell down and crashed on top of the shortest hoodie, leaving only the muscly one and the guy in camo.

I dived out, and ran full pelt towards Muscly Hoodie. My head connected with his stomach, and he flew about five feet before hitting the ground. I thought I was in the clear, when something hard hit the back of my head. A Revolution, the same colours as the hoodie leader's jacket, had struck me in the back of the head, dazing me rather effectively. He withdrew a blade from somewhere within the folds of his hoodie, and started towards me.

Time seemed to slow down for me then. General Hoodie was still walking, just really slowly. I hopped to my feet, reached into my pocket and pulled out a pale-green flower. Where did the flower come from? How did I know it was there? It was as if I wasn't in control of my body anymore. I pointed my hand at the oncoming hoodie, and the flower disappeared. He looked surprised, but I completely knew what I was doing. I started building up energy in my palm, curling it up into a ball. It was growing now, until it looked ready to explode, and I released it, a green fireball shooting towards the General.

It didn't explode on impact like I had expected, but rather seemed to send a jolt of electricity running through him. It looked really,_ really _painful nonetheless, so I backed away. I was worried I might have killed him, but, no such luck, as he glared at me and muttered, "This… isn't over… Remember the name… General Guy…"

I turned and ran.

_Pretty bizarre stuff, dont'cha think? What's all this crap about a flower? And who is the mysterious General Guy? Tune in next time to find out!_


End file.
